(scene. A small photocopier room. Sounds of copying. Copier is actually offstage)
Stuart: People always seem to meet at photocopiers
Sam: Oh yes, powerful, dangerous places. Like ley lines.
Stuart: What do you mean?
Sam: Well, Bill and Sarah first met here. Married within two months…
Stuart: That’s great!
Sam:… divorced within six.
Sam: Terry Shore found out he was going to be made redundant here, by reading his redundancy letter that Cliff Parker had accidentally left on the copying plate.
Stuart: That’s rough…
Sam: Not as rough as his suicide a week later.
Sam: Four people have died of cancer that I have met here over the last year.. There was Alice Gordon who got…
Stuart: Alright, alright. I get the idea.
Sam: And then of course there’s Suzanne Barnham’s stroke, last Wednesday…
Stuart: Not here as well?
Sam: Yep, actually she fell exactly where you are standing. She was queuing to copy a tea rota.
Stuart: How is she?
Sam: Funeral is on Thursday.
Stuart: Oh, my god.
Sam: Ah, copier’s free – you got much to do?
Stuart (looks at his wadge of paper and then at the photocopier)
Stuart: Er.. nothing that can’t wait.
(He turns to leave. Lights)